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The role of guilt

How does guilt feel for you?⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ For me, it's this knowing feeling in my stomach and pain in my heart that makes me feel like I am a terrible, selfish person.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ It's like the damage is done and there's nothing I can do to fix it, so I beat myself up for it.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ I know...not overly productive or healthy...but it's a common way we all feel.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ I was taught that feeling guilty meant that I was a good person.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ And when I didn't feel guilty, I was selfish.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ I personally am not an advocate for guilt.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ I do not want anyone to feel like shit, ever.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ I choose empathy over guilt.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ Empathizing with someone else's pain,⁠⠀ taking responsibility for our actions in it,⁠⠀ committing to doing differently the next time⁠⠀ and then moving forward.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ Guilt has the potential to eat you up alive and cause you to self-destruct.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ IT IS NOT WORTH IT.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ ❤️⁠⠀

​(Photo by Creating Light Studio.) ⁠⠀ In the latest episode of The You Relationship Podcast, Melanie Oborne and I talk about guilt and the unnecessary pain it causes.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ We talk about the pressure we feel to be there for others above ourselves.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ Melanie shares about how doing just that created friendships for her that were

one-sided and that only when she was no longer able to put others ahead of herself that this became clear to her.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ If you have ever struggled with guilt, I invite you to check out the episode.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ At the end of the episode I have included an emotional voice memo I recorded of myself over the heart-crushing guilt I felt over ending my marriage.⁠⠀ ⁠⠀ You can check out the episode.

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